WALT use precise nouns to add detail for our reader

This Week in writing we have been using precise nouns to make our writing more specific for the reader

We took a paragraphs and changed the nouns from general nouns to precise nouns

Here is an example

In the weekend I had lot of shopping to do with my mother.We went to the KFC to get some lunch  box  .We also went to look for some Phone for my  Ally birthday.I had to choose between a doll and a soft toy. After  that we went to the farmers  to buy some  I got two new dress and  a pair of Nike.Because I had been so good,mum took me the dairy to buy an lollies .Lucky me

Ka Kite

From:OSANA

Rugby World cup four sentence recount

WALT:Recount an event 4 sentence

Yesterday we wrote about the rugby world cup because the all black have won in a roll two times.

Students writing Targets Osana Liaina

This term in writing I am going to be working on two goals.

They are:

Read my writing to that check it sounds right.
Check that I have only included important information.

I know that i can achieve these goal:By giving it to my teacher and i checking it.

Saturn information report

We have been learning about space 

Take a photo of your plan using an ipad and insert it here.

Success Criteria

Clear categories with subtitles	Self	LB
Use questions to hook the reader in the introduction	✔
Use sentences and paragraphs	✔
Use facts to inform the reader	✔
Use different sentence starters	✔
Use VCOP	✔

Start writing here…

• Introduction

Saturn is the second largest planet on the solar system why does earth the only planets that has gravity.

• Paragraph 1-Appearance

It  has beautiful rings and Saturn is light brown and it even saturn rings aren't very thick saturn's rings are made out of dust,ice and rocks. It has no water on saturn ,saturn has 62 moon titan is the largest and is the only moon in the solar system with an atmosphere .Saturn is a gas giant just like jupiter and it is a very cold place.

• Paragraph 2-Size

Saturn size is 20,000 KM and it is the second smallest planet on the solar system saturn is far from Earth.Saturn is approximately 1,427 million km from the sun and saturn is very heavy at all.

• paragraph 3-time on saturn

Every 14 years the ring look like they’ve disappear when viewed through as small  or medium sized telescope .A planet day is the time it take the planet to rotate or spin once on it axis Saturn rotate faster than Earth. Also Saturn is the second smallest planet in our solar System.The ring around saturn are thick and they are about 20 meters deep.That’s about two school bus lengths